Big Talker the novel: Synopsis

By request, here’s a little more deets about Big Talker — the novel.  That’s for all my friends who don’t like to log in and comment, haven’t yet snagged a bootleg copy of my book — or just want to humor me. (Which is always a very good thing, right?)

And check out my comments on The Dark Knight and Mamma Mia! It seems my movie reviews are starting to get popular so I guess I’ll have to attend more often.  Pineapple Express anyone?

Big Talker is about what happens when good gossip goes bad. Aspiring writer J.M. Rowen is the oldest daughter of the famous acting couple Ruby Dumont and Burt Rowen. Her bratty beautiful younger sister Sammy seems destined for life in the spotlight too, if she can just stop rebelling. All this celebrity mayhem is enough to drive the depressed, reclusive J.M. over the edge.

After J.M. suffers a post-college meltdown, her dad uses his connections to help her snag a studio job as a script reader/analyst, although her diva mother Ruby has higher career goals for her. Ruby’s best friend is Buddy Boxer, a gossip columnist who pens a poisonous syndicated column, Big Talker and makes regular appearances on a primetime TV show, Total Entertainment.

Ruby and Buddy think J.M is the perfect choice to ghostwrite Buddy’s memoirs. Reluctant to become more of a ghost than she already is, J.M. stalls. But when Buddy is shot in what police deem a home break-in, a distraught Ruby is convinced her beloved Buddy is the target of a crazed stalker. She begs J.M. to quit her job and start working for him to keep his column alive while he recuperates.

Making it a family affair, sister Sammy is enlisted to be the new TV face to provide celebrity dish in Buddy’s absence. Learning the tricks of the trade, J.M. enjoys the anonymity of putting nasty words in Sammy’s beautiful, mean-spirited mouth. Sammy becomes an overnight sensation.

Meanwhile, it seems that there really is a stalker – albeit a not too bright one. Does he really want Buddy dead, or does he just want him to stop writing? With Buddy firmly ensconced behind the walls of Casa Ruby, the stalker sets his sights on J.M.

If life weren’t complicated enough, J.M. meets and falls for the delectable movie star, Ben Stratton. It seems that no matter how far she tries to run from Hollywood it’s always right in her backyard.

Dark Knight Brings in the Light

In a time when mediocrity has often made moviegoing a chore rather than entertainment, Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight restores my belief that there are people in showbiz who understand that rich storytelling really does matter.  Audiences are smarter than Hollywood often wants to believe — and this weekend they proved it by flocking to the theatres resulting in a record-breaking box office weekend tally of $158.4 million.

Profoundly entertaining on every level, I relished it like a delicious meal and walked away inspired. Inspired about movies, art, life. It’s really that good.

By now most have read the plot so there’s no need to go there except to say it blows past the typical comic-book genre and turns it into something magical. Writing, directing and acting are firing on all cylinders. 

The screenplay by brothers Christopher and Jonathan Nolan is amazing - exploring the complexities of good vs. evil in ways that make you laugh, cheer and shake in your boots.   The acting is  triumphant. Yes, Heath Ledger’s Joker is mesmerizing, hysterical, disturbing — wonderfully fresh — but all the other characters are as fully realized. Christian Bale’s Batman is beautiful and wonderful to behold, and Gary Oldman as Commissioner Gordon makes you forget that he is just acting, after all. Aaron Eckhart, Morgan Freeman and Michael Caine are perfect, too.

I’m ignoring all the headlines contemplating: Is this Batman too dark, blah-de-blah-de-blah. Yes, it is dark. Dark and disturbing but also hopeful. Because in the darkness there is light — revealing the good in people, and the belief that humanity will fight against the darkness when it seems like fighting will do no good at all.

Loved, loved loved it. What about you?

 

 And did you know…Big Talker is not just a blog…it’s a whole big novel and I’ll be posting some chapters here. Help it get to an airport bookstore near you. Tell me what you think. It’s about Hollywood, movies, stars and…murder.

Big Talker – The Novel – Start Reading it Now

Chapter One: What’s in a Name? 

Chapter Two: Dainty-Dainty Goes Down

Mamma Mia – Sorry, It’s Still All About the Meryl

My idol Ebert’s rating was right on: It’s a two-star flick. That makes me sad, but I paid me money and am not sorry I did. Yes, I am talking about Mamma Mia!   l actually had a day off from the corporate machine and went and matineed it alone. No, I didn’t subject hubby — I was there with all the blue hairs.

I was underwhelmed. I  can dream about what could’ve been but in the end it was what it was. Most fans of the musical will appreciate it.

For me, any movie that involves her presence is worth the dough. Yes, it’s always about the Meryl. She is what makes a movie worth watching — even a 2-star movie, which I guess this really was. And Pierce Bronson ain’t half-bad either. I love him and he appears to be a great kisser — something extremely important if you are laying a big one on the Meryl.

But to say Mamma Mia! worked for me is like saying my son actually understands cleaning up in the kitchen.  His half-hearted attempts at wiping down a counter and getting the dishes loaded in some kind of strategic fashion in the dishwasher  turns into performance art, but it ain’t housecleaning. You appreciate the effort, but you always think you can do it better yourself.

The thing is: It should have really been better than it was. Greece, Meryl, Colin Firth, Pierce Bronson Stellen Skarsgard, Judy Walters, Christine Baranski — what’s not to love? And the delicious music of ABBA.

The plot is paper thin as many musicals are and should be — yet, in this case, it withers under the camera’s eye. Yes, Greece is beautiful. Yes, the songs are charming. But the whole story is too broad to stand up to all that Greek sunlight and wind that makes the stars’ hair fly into their mouths. And I’m not crazy about  Amanda Seyfried as Sophie. Yes, she is pretty and blond and sparkly but why do all the young romanic ingenues have to turn into some kind of lemon-flavored yogurt? I was there when Streepy was young enough to be an ingenue and she always ignited the screen. You don’t have to be young, beautiful and boring.

In the end, I found myself trying too hard to like this movie. It was simply tough to go along for the ride. Well, not too tough, actually.

Consider the strategy of Dream Girls - they built the action behind the scenes before any one of those dynamic chicks ever walked onstage. All that drama made for a real emotional ride and the music never stopped the flow —  it made everything pop. Of course, you can’t compare story lines, but there is something to be said for building a simple reality even if it is in a movie musical.

I won’t stop anybody from seeing Mamma MIa!  But I’d also say — for a touch of real ABBA magic rent Muriel’s Wedding.

 

Big Talker – The Novel – Start Reading it Now

Big Talker is not just a blog…it’s a whole big novel and I’ll be posting some chapters here. Help it get to an airport bookstore near you. Tell me what you think. It’s about Hollywood, movies, stars and…murder.

Chapter One: What’s in a Name? 

Chapter Two: Dainty-Dainty Goes Down

Movie Review: Not “Wanted”

No, it was not  good for me.

Although my idol Roger Ebert gave the new Angelina Jolie/James McAvoy flick Wanted 3 Stars, I think he was being overly generous — not in his review really,  but in his stars rating. I give it a big whoppin’ 1 star – but who am I anyway?  Just your average summer movie viewer – looking for a little sumpin’ sumpin.

Please do not read further if you want to see this movie and don’t want to be tainted by my disappointment in Hollywood and writing that is completely ludicrous.

The last paragraph of Ebert’s review sums up my feelings exactly. I’ve pasted it in here and linked to the entire review — but why the 3 stars? Why, why why?

In a nutshell: I hated it. Look, I wanted to throw hubby a bone by taking him to a nice “guy”/action flick/Angelina-type hot extravaganza. But even by midway through he was apologizing to me for it. I was silent but I do admit to rolling my eyes. Many times. I guess he noticed.

When we left, I asked him, “Tell me, what was your favorite part?”

He said: “Angelina’s back.” I had to agree.

 Look, I am not a movie snob. I am willing to go with the “suspension of disbelief.”  I turn to my friends at Wikipedia to define this:

Wikipedia: Suspension of disbelief is an aesthetic theory intended to characterize people’s relationships to art. It was coined by the poet and aesthetic philosopher Samuel Taylor Coleridge in 1817. It refers to the willingness of a person to accept as true the premises of a work of fiction, even if they are fantastic or impossible.

I want to go along for the ride. I was a big fan of The Matrix,  The Long Kiss Goodnight and  True Lies . But friends, this movie is not in the same league.

Okay — I turn to my guru Ebert to sum it up:

“Wanted,” directed by a hot Russian actionmeister named Timur Bekmambetov, is a film entirely lacking in two organs I always appreciate in a movie: a heart and a mind. It is mindless, heartless, preposterous. By the end of the film, we can’t even believe the values the plot seems to believe, since the plot is deceived right along with us. The way to enjoy this film is to put your logic on hold, along with any higher sensitivities that might be vulnerable and immerse yourself as if in a video game. That “Wanted” will someday be a video game, I have not the slightest doubt. It may already be a video game, but I’m damned if I’ll look it up and find out. Objectively, I award it all honors for technical excellence. Subjectively, I’d rather be watching Danny Kaye in the film version of “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty.”

If I wanted to play a video game, hey – I would rent or buy one. When I go to the movies I expect to see something that tries to be more than that. But maybe my expectations are just way too high.

And finally, I am a big Morgan Freeman fan but he should play something way against type at this point. And please don’t, Morgan, narrate anything for a stretch or play God. No paycheck is worth it.

Ebert dubs his character’s traits in Wanted as ”deep and wise” — his point being — would we expect anything else?

90210 Take 2: Tori out, Shannen in

A birdie just shared a Yahoo TV tip with me: Shannen is hitting Beverly Hills again.  You know, I was asking all about that just awhile back.

According to Yahoo:  In a nutshell: Shannen Doherty is in, Tori Spelling is out and Jennie Garth may be—wait for it—reuniting with Shannen on the screen.  Read the full story.

Cool Reality TV: I adori Tori

On Mustang Sal’s superficiality meter – Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood gets 5 stars.

Why? Because for Reality TV this show is Feather Light. Lighter than lemon mousse in an air-conditioned fancy restaurant on a hot day. Yummmeee.

 Tori is actually intelligent, funny and genuinely nice. When she talks, I don’t wince.  I think, wow, the girl has got a brain.

Again, Dean is so nice and patient it still scares me, but you know, I gotta give the guy his props. If he’s acting he should get an Emmy.

I wish I could just spend my time blogging, writing novels and wallowing in entertainment. But right now I’m working for the man and logging in crazy hours. So, I can’t get stressed out by my TV viewing. No plagues, murders, espionage — no, no. I can watch CNN for that.

Tuesdays at 10 – or just Tivo it.